Last night, a Raleigh friend came over to the house with her mother to visit. I began talking to her mom and found out that she is a nurse in an ER just past Lancaster, SC, in a town that has "springs" in it. She encouraged me to work in a rural hospital because of the amount of experience I would get. She said that because they are further away from a main hospital such as CMC downtown, that they see a lot of stuff in the ER that you wouldn't normally see. Burn victims, drug abuse, gun wounds, you name it! Apparently nurses get a lot more autonomy too. Her mother also told me that it is better to start somewhere like ER because then you can transfer where ever you want. A lot of times if you start out (and stay) in somewhere like Med Serg, you get "pegged" as a Med Serg nurse and have to stay there. I don't think I would mind working in SC to start off... Especially if I was close to the barn and could go ride!
I really have no idea what kind of nursing I will go into when I graduate. There are so many options! Stay in Charlotte, go to Raleigh, go overseas, travel nursing, camp nurse, graduate school, you name it! Every time I try to figure stuff out I feel like I am not supposed to worry about it right now. My other friend, Lauren, recently gave me a GRE study book because I had mentioned maybe wanting to go to grad school. When I got it, I felt like a kid who had burnt her tongue on cookies that weren't yet finished. The end will be perfectly sweet if I just wait on it.
"Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."
I just made a s'more in the microwave. Delicious!
In other news... I am almost completely moved into the NoDa condo. I LOVE IT!!! I can't wait to post pictures when my room is finished. It is going to be magazine worthy :)
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Missionaries
I am not sure I will do this story justice... but I figured I would try. Enjoy :)
Last Monday, the most amazing thing happened at work. I got my assignment, and made my morning rounds to get vital signs. One of the last patients I visited was a 40/50-something year old man appeared to have mental and physical handicaps. I figured he must have been born that way and was surprised to hear that he had a wife and children. I thought, "hmm... Maybe his wife is handicap too?" The reason I thought there was something "off" was because when I would talk to him, his mouth would remain slightly open and his eyes were glazed and unfocused as if he were looking straight through me. His body twitched and jerked and he kept grabbing at his leg saying that it hurt. I wasn't sure what to do, and continued to take his vital signs while holding my breath at his smell. I knew that he wanted or needed something, but he couldn't express to me what it was. I didn't know what to do and secretly wished that his wife would hurry up and come to the hospital so that she would take care of him. Horrible, I know. I talked to the other nursing assistant that had him as a patient a few days prior and she shared that he had Hunington's Disease, and was currently hospitalized because of a back injury. Him and his family were on vacation from Illinois and he had fallen in the middle of the night while using the restroom. When he fell, he broke the toilet, and a shattered piece went into his back, piercing straight to the bone. Apparently there was water and blood everywhere, and it was an awful sight. She told me that his wife was really sweet, and that she had told her that when her husband, P*, was in pain, that he would have more tremors. I shared this with my nurse, and she gave him some pain medicine to alleviate his symptoms.
His wife arrived shortly after breakfast, and was very bubbly. She had short brown hair, hiking pants, and a little purse back-pack. I thought she looked like she should be either at Disney World or on a safari in Africa. We talked, and I asked her (hoping) if she wanted to bathe her husband. She said she had never done a bed bath, so she wanted to watch me to learn. It ended up being the best experience ever... As I bathed P, I asked A* about Hunington's Disease and their vacation to Raleigh. She shared that the disease was progressive, and that when she married P, they had no idea that he had it. In his 30's he started to exhibit signs such as a leg twitch, and later tested positive for the gene. Slowly the disease has killed his brain cells, resulting in physical and cognitive handicaps. In fact, they were in Raleigh for a Hunington's Disease conference. She told me about all the research scientists have been doing and how much progress they have made. She did say, however, that there probably would not be a significant cure or palliative device until it was too late for P. I asked about their occupations, and A told me that they were actually missionaries in Africa when P was diagnosed with Hunington's Disease. I could not believe my ears... I had JUST been convicted a few days prior that no matter what I did or how much I "loved God", I was not entitled to perfect health. Specifically, I was challenged by the thought of becoming ill while doing something extremely philanthropic such as serving as a nurse in Africa. Chills ran across my skin as she began to tell me about the journey Hunington's Disease has sent her and her husband on... She told me how P was a Pastor, speaking 3 different languages, and lived amongst the native people. When they learned that P had HD, people told them that he would be healed because they were missionaries and were "serving God". She said she knew that God could heal P if He wanted, but that this was His will for them. She said that she had learned a lot about faith and trusting God's purpose. How this was God's will for now, even though it did not look like what she thought it should. P is a greeter at their Church in Illinois, and that countless individuals have shared with her how much of an encouragement he has been to them. He is at church every Sunday and remembers everyones names. I told A that I was amazed by her and the fact that she is faithful to him, and to God. It would have been so easy to run away from this man, for it was clear that this failing body and mind was not the individual that she married. She then told me about their children... They have two daughters -- both whom have tested positive for the HD gene :( -- and an adopted son from Africa. The son was born on the road while his mother and sisters were escaping Rowanda. When the family arrived to their refuge destination, his mother and sisters got very ill and died. A and P had been praying about adopting a child, and then this little baby boy came to them as an orphan. They said there was a lot of heartache involved in adoption, because anyone could have come and claimed him (even child soldier people that did not know him) and they would have had to oblige due to lack of rights as non-citizens. She showed me pictures of her son and told me how he is in school in Il, has straight A's, is on sports teams, and is a great kid. She was so proud!
Before I left the family for the day, I knew I needed to pray with them. I asked if I could (apparently as a nurse we are allowed to provide spiritual support so this was totally in my scope of practice!), and she joyfully said "that would be wonderful." I placed my hand on P's, and A put her arm around him. I don't remember half of what I said, but I know I thanked them for the encouragement that they were to me and for peace and healing of body and soul. When I was finished, A was crying and P had a peaceful look upon his face and said his only clear words of the day: "thank you." A walked over, hugged me, and said that this was an answered prayer. She said that she was encouraged to see someone my age convicted by the fact that my health may flee, but that only one thing remains constant. I can try to figure out how I was an answered prayer, or try to remember what I said, or analyze how crazy the whole situation was... but I know that it doesn't matter. All that matters is that in that moment, something greater happened to all of us.
Last Monday, the most amazing thing happened at work. I got my assignment, and made my morning rounds to get vital signs. One of the last patients I visited was a 40/50-something year old man appeared to have mental and physical handicaps. I figured he must have been born that way and was surprised to hear that he had a wife and children. I thought, "hmm... Maybe his wife is handicap too?" The reason I thought there was something "off" was because when I would talk to him, his mouth would remain slightly open and his eyes were glazed and unfocused as if he were looking straight through me. His body twitched and jerked and he kept grabbing at his leg saying that it hurt. I wasn't sure what to do, and continued to take his vital signs while holding my breath at his smell. I knew that he wanted or needed something, but he couldn't express to me what it was. I didn't know what to do and secretly wished that his wife would hurry up and come to the hospital so that she would take care of him. Horrible, I know. I talked to the other nursing assistant that had him as a patient a few days prior and she shared that he had Hunington's Disease, and was currently hospitalized because of a back injury. Him and his family were on vacation from Illinois and he had fallen in the middle of the night while using the restroom. When he fell, he broke the toilet, and a shattered piece went into his back, piercing straight to the bone. Apparently there was water and blood everywhere, and it was an awful sight. She told me that his wife was really sweet, and that she had told her that when her husband, P*, was in pain, that he would have more tremors. I shared this with my nurse, and she gave him some pain medicine to alleviate his symptoms.
His wife arrived shortly after breakfast, and was very bubbly. She had short brown hair, hiking pants, and a little purse back-pack. I thought she looked like she should be either at Disney World or on a safari in Africa. We talked, and I asked her (hoping) if she wanted to bathe her husband. She said she had never done a bed bath, so she wanted to watch me to learn. It ended up being the best experience ever... As I bathed P, I asked A* about Hunington's Disease and their vacation to Raleigh. She shared that the disease was progressive, and that when she married P, they had no idea that he had it. In his 30's he started to exhibit signs such as a leg twitch, and later tested positive for the gene. Slowly the disease has killed his brain cells, resulting in physical and cognitive handicaps. In fact, they were in Raleigh for a Hunington's Disease conference. She told me about all the research scientists have been doing and how much progress they have made. She did say, however, that there probably would not be a significant cure or palliative device until it was too late for P. I asked about their occupations, and A told me that they were actually missionaries in Africa when P was diagnosed with Hunington's Disease. I could not believe my ears... I had JUST been convicted a few days prior that no matter what I did or how much I "loved God", I was not entitled to perfect health. Specifically, I was challenged by the thought of becoming ill while doing something extremely philanthropic such as serving as a nurse in Africa. Chills ran across my skin as she began to tell me about the journey Hunington's Disease has sent her and her husband on... She told me how P was a Pastor, speaking 3 different languages, and lived amongst the native people. When they learned that P had HD, people told them that he would be healed because they were missionaries and were "serving God". She said she knew that God could heal P if He wanted, but that this was His will for them. She said that she had learned a lot about faith and trusting God's purpose. How this was God's will for now, even though it did not look like what she thought it should. P is a greeter at their Church in Illinois, and that countless individuals have shared with her how much of an encouragement he has been to them. He is at church every Sunday and remembers everyones names. I told A that I was amazed by her and the fact that she is faithful to him, and to God. It would have been so easy to run away from this man, for it was clear that this failing body and mind was not the individual that she married. She then told me about their children... They have two daughters -- both whom have tested positive for the HD gene :( -- and an adopted son from Africa. The son was born on the road while his mother and sisters were escaping Rowanda. When the family arrived to their refuge destination, his mother and sisters got very ill and died. A and P had been praying about adopting a child, and then this little baby boy came to them as an orphan. They said there was a lot of heartache involved in adoption, because anyone could have come and claimed him (even child soldier people that did not know him) and they would have had to oblige due to lack of rights as non-citizens. She showed me pictures of her son and told me how he is in school in Il, has straight A's, is on sports teams, and is a great kid. She was so proud!
Before I left the family for the day, I knew I needed to pray with them. I asked if I could (apparently as a nurse we are allowed to provide spiritual support so this was totally in my scope of practice!), and she joyfully said "that would be wonderful." I placed my hand on P's, and A put her arm around him. I don't remember half of what I said, but I know I thanked them for the encouragement that they were to me and for peace and healing of body and soul. When I was finished, A was crying and P had a peaceful look upon his face and said his only clear words of the day: "thank you." A walked over, hugged me, and said that this was an answered prayer. She said that she was encouraged to see someone my age convicted by the fact that my health may flee, but that only one thing remains constant. I can try to figure out how I was an answered prayer, or try to remember what I said, or analyze how crazy the whole situation was... but I know that it doesn't matter. All that matters is that in that moment, something greater happened to all of us.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Sorry for the delay...
Hello blog readers!
Sorry for the delay in entries, I have been a busy gal. I worked Sun, Mon, Wed, Thurs, each 12-hour shifts. Yikes! The shifts go by quickly, but it messes up my "routine." I like to have time every day to spend with others, and then alone, but I am unable to do that when I only have 3 hours before bedtime every night and need to clean dishes and perform other various household tasks.
I enjoy talking to my patients and have found that they give me a lot of positive feedback. There is one patient, the same fellow who likes the IV's in his veins, that told me yesterday that he really appreciated me, that I "carried myself well", that he could tell I was a good person, and has told his son about me because I was pretty. Haha. Later he told me, "If you ever want to take a break and talk to me for five minutes, just come on in. I love talkin' to ya." Then another time he told me he was going to "add me into his will" and "dance at my wedding." Maybe that is weird or bad, but he never makes me feel uncomfortable so I don't mind. Another woman who is always really quiet and seems upset said something really kind to me today. I needed to take her blood pressure and asked her how she was feeling. She said she was having trouble sleeping because people kept waking her up so I apologized . After a moment, in her same pained voice, "I am not bothered by you, you always make me smile."
As far as my nursing skills go, I am becoming much more confident in what I do. Lately my nurses will just tell me to do some of their tasks and I will go and do them by myself. It is great! Today I hung IV's and took care of a lot of patients on my own. I realized too today while I was holding my breath and dumping out a urinal that I will be prepared for motherhood if I ever have children! Haha!
I have a really amazing story to share, but I want to have time to sit down and really write it out. It deserves that much effort. Until then, this will have to suffice. Thanks for listening!
Sorry for the delay in entries, I have been a busy gal. I worked Sun, Mon, Wed, Thurs, each 12-hour shifts. Yikes! The shifts go by quickly, but it messes up my "routine." I like to have time every day to spend with others, and then alone, but I am unable to do that when I only have 3 hours before bedtime every night and need to clean dishes and perform other various household tasks.
I enjoy talking to my patients and have found that they give me a lot of positive feedback. There is one patient, the same fellow who likes the IV's in his veins, that told me yesterday that he really appreciated me, that I "carried myself well", that he could tell I was a good person, and has told his son about me because I was pretty. Haha. Later he told me, "If you ever want to take a break and talk to me for five minutes, just come on in. I love talkin' to ya." Then another time he told me he was going to "add me into his will" and "dance at my wedding." Maybe that is weird or bad, but he never makes me feel uncomfortable so I don't mind. Another woman who is always really quiet and seems upset said something really kind to me today. I needed to take her blood pressure and asked her how she was feeling. She said she was having trouble sleeping because people kept waking her up so I apologized . After a moment, in her same pained voice, "I am not bothered by you, you always make me smile."
As far as my nursing skills go, I am becoming much more confident in what I do. Lately my nurses will just tell me to do some of their tasks and I will go and do them by myself. It is great! Today I hung IV's and took care of a lot of patients on my own. I realized too today while I was holding my breath and dumping out a urinal that I will be prepared for motherhood if I ever have children! Haha!
I have a really amazing story to share, but I want to have time to sit down and really write it out. It deserves that much effort. Until then, this will have to suffice. Thanks for listening!
Monday, June 28, 2010
New Look Tattoo
From roaring lions to Hebrew wedding vows, I find permanent masterpieces painted upon many of my friends. Nearly half of the individuals I know have some sort of tattoo, so it is no surprise that I have thought about getting one myself. I know I would enjoy this form of self-expression, but I am almost certain the novelty would wear off and I would be ready for its removal. I have heard rumors of “temporary” ink, and have questioned the ease to which a permanent tattoo could be removed. As I researched my options, I found “New Look Laser Tattoo Removal” in Texas at http://www.newlookhouston.com/TattooRemoval.html. Interestingly enough, the Director of Clinic Practice is a Nurse Practitioner, a profession I have considered pursuing after I complete my Bachelors degree in Nursing. As I read the New Look Tattoo website, I found that laser tattoo removal is no quick fix, but rather a three-to-ten session commitment. While the office is successful at removing ink, they encourage individuals to carefully consider the long-term implications before getting a tattoo. Knowing this, I think I will continue to "opt out" of tattooing and instead enjoy the display on other people’s canvasses. Check it out!
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Highlights!
Last night I was bummed about working today, a Sunday, but it has been one of my BEST days so far... Here are the highlights.
1. This morning I woke up with so much joy in my heart that I put on a worship song and danced around the house in my pjs. At 5:30 I danced with more energy and zeal than I have after a shot of espresso.
2. I made a TURKEY sandwich for lunch with delicious fresh tomatoes.
3. On the way to work I blasted wonderful tunes from a CD a new friend gave me last night.
4. My nurse preceptor and I got along wonderfully..
5. My patient made me laugh when we pushed some fluid through his IV and he said "that feels good. I love the feeling of the cold going through my vein." Drug addict?
6. This same patient had a country-talking, overall wearin', friend come visit. When he took the patient out for lunch, my nurse asked kindly, "you aren't going to smoke are you?" The friend replied, "I won't give him no cigarettes, but I may give him some of this." Chuckling, he pulled out a bag of what appeared to be weed. As he left he said, "I bet you ain't never seen that from a 68 year old, huh."
7. One of the patients brought us Panera coffee cake. YUMMM.
8. I came home and ran, sweat, and de-cluttered my mind.
9. When I made dinner there were NO ants in sight. Hallelujah!
10. After giving bed baths, I have a new appreciation for the shower I am about to take.
1. This morning I woke up with so much joy in my heart that I put on a worship song and danced around the house in my pjs. At 5:30 I danced with more energy and zeal than I have after a shot of espresso.
2. I made a TURKEY sandwich for lunch with delicious fresh tomatoes.
3. On the way to work I blasted wonderful tunes from a CD a new friend gave me last night.
4. My nurse preceptor and I got along wonderfully..
5. My patient made me laugh when we pushed some fluid through his IV and he said "that feels good. I love the feeling of the cold going through my vein." Drug addict?
6. This same patient had a country-talking, overall wearin', friend come visit. When he took the patient out for lunch, my nurse asked kindly, "you aren't going to smoke are you?" The friend replied, "I won't give him no cigarettes, but I may give him some of this." Chuckling, he pulled out a bag of what appeared to be weed. As he left he said, "I bet you ain't never seen that from a 68 year old, huh."
7. One of the patients brought us Panera coffee cake. YUMMM.
8. I came home and ran, sweat, and de-cluttered my mind.
9. When I made dinner there were NO ants in sight. Hallelujah!
10. After giving bed baths, I have a new appreciation for the shower I am about to take.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
How He loves us
Today I had dinner with a new friend from Raleigh, and she was sharing about her life and specific hurt. As we talked, she asked me, "Have you heard the song "How He Loves"? I smiled and said I had, keeping to myself that I am good friends with the girl whose brother the song was inspired by (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NXWE6AC8ao). She continued her story, telling me how through all of this hurt and suffering in her life right now, she is closer to God than she has ever been before. That she is learning that God loves her in a deep personal way and that His heart breaks with every tear she cries. She continued on to say how the line "loves like hurricane, I am tree bending beneath the weight of His win and mercy" spoke to her during a specific low time. It was during this moment that she was driving through, you guessed it, a hurricane whose winds made the tips of trees kiss the ground. The song opened up a new door to receiving the infinite love the Lord had for her. As she told the story with joy on her lips and tears in her eyes, I couldn't help but get choked up as chills covered my body. I thought of the suffering endured by families and friends of the song-inspired man, and how out of that brokenness was birthed a song that has transformed the souls of many. That through death, a song offers hope. Wow.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Scabies
Yesterday on the unit was an interesting day... When I arrived, I found out that I would be shadowing a Wound Nurse at 9 am and the PICC team at 1 pm. Since I arrived at 6:45 am, I decided to ask the nurses and nurse aides if there was anything I could do to help pass the time in between. One nurse assistant asked me to take 4 of her patients' morning vital signs. I happily agreed and went on my way. As I got to my last patient, a 40+/- year old big man with a long grey pony tail, I began taking vital signs while a respiratory nurse explained a breathing treatment to him (he has breathing difficulties and was a chronic smoker.) I had forgotten to write down the results on the clip board in the patient's room, so I walked back in after the nurses had left. While I was in there charting, the patient started coughing, fell back onto his bed, turned bright red, and was shaking. I rushed over to him and asked if he was ok, only to have no response. I wasn't sure what to do so I ran down the hall calling out "I need help." One nurse asked if I needed the "Rapid Response Team" but I told her I wasn't sure. The respiratory nurse came back to the room with me only to find the patient sitting upright saying with twang, "I must've passed out." The respiratory nurse said to me, "he's fine." I was so embarrassed. I don't want a reputation as being the little student who cries wolf. After some reflection I realized that I should not worry what others thought, for I acted as I should have. If there had been something very wrong with the patient, every second would have counted. I talked to my supervisor later that afternoon and she told me I did the right thing which lead to good conversation about different hospital protocol.
I then followed around the Wound Nurse. We saw a lot of pressure ulcers and diabetic feet. It was interesting, and I like the fact that wound healing is measurable. It's not a game of "let's try this and see how you feel." Instead you can try a method and actually see if the wound is getting smaller. When I came back to the floor to take my lunch break, I was informed that the patient who pretended to die on me was now on contact precautions because he had scabies. Everyone who had touched him or been in his room now how to give their information to Employee Health for follow up. Apparently the doctor had known all along that the patient had scabies but failed to pass it along to the rest of us. NOT cool. I was concerned and washed my hands and arms well. One nursing assistant started telling me that scabies could cover your entire body and kill you. That was not a good feeling. I talked to another nurse though, and she said her baby had gotten it from day care and that it wasn't that big of a deal. She said that if I got scabies I would just have to take medicine, wash my clothes and sheets, and not touch anyone. That made me feel a bit better, but I still was not happy.
Then I followed around the PICC nurse. A PICC line is an IV that is inserted and then advanced through increasingly larger veins, toward the heart until the tip rests in the distal superior vena cava or cavoatrial junction, connected to the heart. This is a dangerous procedure, and the team that performs them is specially trained. Unfortunately, no PICCs were ordered on Tuesday, so instead I talked with the nurse about how she is in the process of getting her black belt in Karate. haha. We went for a walk around the hospital together, drank cokes, and had a merry time. Around 4 I went back to the 5th floor and did random tasks such as answering call bells, helping lift patients, and answering the telephone. At 6:45, I went with the nursing assistant to get scrubs from the basement to change into so our "scabies scrubs" would not contaminate our cars.
I knew I should get home to wash my clothes, but I really just needed a moment to reflect, pray, etc, before I continued on. I wanted to go get dinner somewhere and read and had a peace about going, so I did it. Plus I figured if I had caught scabies already, prolonging my shower an extra 30 minutes would not have made much of a difference. While I was eating dinner it occurred to me, "what if I did get scabies even after having a peace about having this time to myself? Would that cause me to question that peace? How would that change my view of God? Would I still trust Him? Would I be mad?" Then I thought even larger... what if I was called to do missions in Africa and then got AIDS while I was helping a child? Would I question God then? Would I be ok with that? As sad as this sounds, I don't think I can honestly say yes. I can't say that I wouldn't be upset. I can't say that my faith would not be shaken. I hate it. It is like I feel entitled to my health. I suppose the first step is recognition and the submission. I know that health, money, and things are fleeting... My life must be built on the Rock that is unfailing.
I then followed around the Wound Nurse. We saw a lot of pressure ulcers and diabetic feet. It was interesting, and I like the fact that wound healing is measurable. It's not a game of "let's try this and see how you feel." Instead you can try a method and actually see if the wound is getting smaller. When I came back to the floor to take my lunch break, I was informed that the patient who pretended to die on me was now on contact precautions because he had scabies. Everyone who had touched him or been in his room now how to give their information to Employee Health for follow up. Apparently the doctor had known all along that the patient had scabies but failed to pass it along to the rest of us. NOT cool. I was concerned and washed my hands and arms well. One nursing assistant started telling me that scabies could cover your entire body and kill you. That was not a good feeling. I talked to another nurse though, and she said her baby had gotten it from day care and that it wasn't that big of a deal. She said that if I got scabies I would just have to take medicine, wash my clothes and sheets, and not touch anyone. That made me feel a bit better, but I still was not happy.
Then I followed around the PICC nurse. A PICC line is an IV that is inserted and then advanced through increasingly larger veins, toward the heart until the tip rests in the distal superior vena cava or cavoatrial junction, connected to the heart. This is a dangerous procedure, and the team that performs them is specially trained. Unfortunately, no PICCs were ordered on Tuesday, so instead I talked with the nurse about how she is in the process of getting her black belt in Karate. haha. We went for a walk around the hospital together, drank cokes, and had a merry time. Around 4 I went back to the 5th floor and did random tasks such as answering call bells, helping lift patients, and answering the telephone. At 6:45, I went with the nursing assistant to get scrubs from the basement to change into so our "scabies scrubs" would not contaminate our cars.
I knew I should get home to wash my clothes, but I really just needed a moment to reflect, pray, etc, before I continued on. I wanted to go get dinner somewhere and read and had a peace about going, so I did it. Plus I figured if I had caught scabies already, prolonging my shower an extra 30 minutes would not have made much of a difference. While I was eating dinner it occurred to me, "what if I did get scabies even after having a peace about having this time to myself? Would that cause me to question that peace? How would that change my view of God? Would I still trust Him? Would I be mad?" Then I thought even larger... what if I was called to do missions in Africa and then got AIDS while I was helping a child? Would I question God then? Would I be ok with that? As sad as this sounds, I don't think I can honestly say yes. I can't say that I wouldn't be upset. I can't say that my faith would not be shaken. I hate it. It is like I feel entitled to my health. I suppose the first step is recognition and the submission. I know that health, money, and things are fleeting... My life must be built on the Rock that is unfailing.
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